Sunday, September 23, 2012

Parenting Pro tip #2

Not to toot my own horn, but I figure I have to have said at least one insightful thing about parenting at this point. I'll be damned if I can tell you what that ONE THING is, but I believe it's out there.

Tonight, I'm going to share pro tip #2. This falls firmly in the category of laundry - it's not just for moms! Dads can do laundry, too! Are you ready for it?

When you take something out of the dryer, fold it and put it in a place where it will get put away in a timely manner. This might be in a laundry basket, on the bed, or even neatly stacked on the dryer to be carried upstairs the next time you go. Laundry takes a lot less time when you don't let the half-ass attempts pile up to the point of being a fucking disaster.

You will thank me for this, for a couple reasons. 1) nobody likes doing laundry. Showing that you're not just paying lip service to "helping around the house" by actually FINISHING a chore goes a long ways. 2) you will likely not find your wife dead on the laundry room floor, where her brain exploded from a aneurism that could not take the sudden blood pressure spike when she realizes that even though it was your morning to take care of the squid, she BELIEVED YOU when you said you had some stuff to do around the house, like laundry, so couldn't SHE just take the baby with her to the grocery store, violating the only consistent me-time she's had in the last 22 months. (Pro-tip #3: doing the household grocery shopping while the baby (and you) naps is not "me-time" for mommy. You are not fooling anyone, you selfish wanker.)

Three loads of laundry picked up off the floor, folded and put away. Another load done, folded and put away, with one more neatly stacked for morning. An essential load in the dryer (loveys, blankets and clothes for the week at daycare) to fold in the morning, with a load of towels washing away, and one more in the queue just waiting to be finished. Who knows how may additional pro-tips about parenting I'll come up with while faced with the drudgery.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad. Fueled by coffee.

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